I think last week’s post, When Anxiety and Depression Threaten to Pull You Under, struck a cord. It seems the darkness I had experienced has been experienced––or is currently being experienced––by many. Over the last week, many people have contacted me asking for help, and with each email that I received, I realized just how important it is that I speak out with complete transparency about what I went through and how I got out of it. I originally decided to write these posts on anxiety and depression in response to correspondence I received from a man I sat next to on an airplane a few weeks back. It was one of those encounters that you know God ordained, but you’re not quite sure why you’re telling a complete stranger your entire life’s story until later. Now, I’m accustom to telling strangers about the crazy story of how God redeemed…
It occurred to me the other day that I haven’t written much about anxiety and depression. If you’ve read some of my early posts, you know that I experienced severe anxiety and depression about five years back, which was ultimately what God used to bring me to Christ. Prior to this, I had been able to get through everything on my own, but I couldn’t seem to get myself out of this one. Honestly, I think God needed to present something to me that I had absolutely no control over for me to finally turn to Him. And though I would never want to return to this terrible place, I am thankful that God did what was necessary to bring me to Himself. But it was such a horrible, dark place to be, and I didn’t know any other person who had been through what I was experiencing, which made…
I freely admit there have been times when I have given Satan entirely way too much power by focusing on him and his latest attack rather than on God. It is true. Satan is real, he is our enemy, and he does attack God’s people. But our attention should not be directed toward him. Yes, we need to understand how Satan works and how to engage in spiritual warfare, for to completely ignore our enemy’s presence would be foolish, but it seems to me that there’s a difference between recognizing and protecting ourselves against attack and being consumed by a current or possible attack in the future. The human mind is incapable of focusing on two things at the same time, so in all actuality, when we focus on Satan, we take our focus off Jesus. But this will never do. We will never be able to defeat Satan by focusing on Satan….
Have you ever had a moment (or many) when you wonder whether or not God will deliver what you believe He’s promised? I sure have. For the last three and a half years, I have heard God tell me, “Do not give up!” Over and over, “Do not give up! Keep moving forward. Keep moving toward your adoption.” But nothing has happened. We’re still waiting. Travis and I began our adoption with nothing but faith, a desire for more children, and confidence in God’s call to adopt. With no money saved and little to devote to such an endeavor, we took the leap, believing God would provide for what He was calling us to do. And He has. Time and time again, provision has come in one form or another usually at the very hour we needed it. This may be too much information to share, but we’re over $20,000…
Receive healing, God told me. I’ve already given it to you. You simply needed to receive it. “Okay. I receive,” I prayed, trying to will myself to receive. But nothing happened. “I receive your healing,” I prayed with greater passion, “I receive!” Still, nothing. “I don’t get it,” I complained to God. “I’m trying to receive! What am I doing wrong?” For many months, I continued to try to will myself into a position of receiving yet saw no indication that God was moving. I was stumped. I have a hard time receiving, in general. Especially from other people. But I do know how to receive from people. It’s pretty cut and dry. To receive from people, you simply take what’s been given to you. But how do you receive from God? Though I know all we have is ultimately from God, the gifts we are to receive from Him are…