This is an extremely rough post. It’s an unedited response I wrote to someone this morning, and felt the Spirit tell me to share it here. I, quite frankly, don’t have time this morning to go through and refine my prose, so I won’t because after all, that’s not what it’s all about. Email after email is pouring into my inbox. There are so many of you struggling right now, and I just don’t have the heart to hold this back for the sake of making it read better. Some of you need this now. Some of you are hanging on to your lifeline by a thread. So here it is. It’s not pretty, but here it is.
On another note, my daughters are off for spring break for two weeks beginning next week, so I’ll be taking some time off with them. BUT, I will be posting scriptures that have helped me through my most darkest hour those weeks, so stay tuned.
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I believe it is God’s intention to heal you, but you must open your heart to him so he can. He never forces himself upon us, so press in. Open your heart and CHOOSE to trust him even if your feelings don’t line up yet. But they will! Jesus came to give us life and life to the FULL!
But I don’t believe God wants us to have any false notion that we have any control when we’re in this place. At least not until we’ve come fully to Him and given up our rights to control. But that’s not to say that we lay lifelessly waiting for God to do something. We can do something, but the best thing we can do is press in to God. I plan on writing more about some practical things we can do, but I want to establish that none of these things will ultimately help if we have not FIRST pressed in to God. If we’re anxiously trying to attain our own healing, it will never work! God is our healer! But we can do things like start noticing our thought patterns. Checking our thoughts to see if they line up with GOD’S truth (not ours). Filling our mind with scripture. One thing I plan on writing about is the importance of keeping certain scriptures handy so we have something to turn to to “talk us down” so to speak. If you’re not familiar with Joyce Meyer’s Battlefield of the Mind book/message, it’s a great one! Also we need to stop asking why? Stop trying to figure it all out, and simply TRUST God, asking for grace to do so.
I remember walking into one of my bible studies early on when the anxiety and depression was at it’s worst. I was filled with anxiety and all I wanted to do was run away. I literally turned around to leave and a woman caught me by the arm, and asked me to sit with her. I would have left that day, but God didn’t let me, and I thank God because had I left––had I listened to my anxiety over God––I would not be where I am now, so press in!!!!
If you’re having a hard time pressing into God, just bring God what you can and that is enough. At the very least, find a few scriptures that point you to where you would like God to bring you and simply pray those scriptures! I’ll be doing a couple posts on scriptures that helped me, but Philippians 4:4-13 is a great place to start. So is 2 Timothy 1:7! Just pray God’s words when you have none of your own and God will take care of the rest. Open your Bible and read, even when you don’t want to! Start with Ephesians and then read Philippians. Read the Psalms!! Psalm 139 is a great one!! Read Isaiah 43! God is talking about YOU there!!
I’ve been struggling with anxiety and depression for about a year now due to my son’s passing of cancer two years ago. Recently, after going through physical exam my doctor said that she found a small lump and wanted me to get mammogram done. I tried not to worry, but my anxiety just kept building and building to the point that I thought I won’t be able to take any more. During our evening service I prayed to God telling Him that I knew it is a sin to worry and that I’m suppose to cast all my anxieties on him, but with my anxiety it seems like I can’t control how I feel physically. As I was listening to the sermon I had a very clear though which was “let it be your will” and I automatically agreed in my mind. That was very surprising to me, because even when my son was going through all treatments we prayed for his healing continually, but I couldn’t say those words. They really scared me. As I repeated that phrase a few times in my mind I felt this release go from top to bottom and I felt so light and happy. All of the sudden I wasn’t scared at all. I thought, even if have cancer and have to go through chemo or die I wasn’t scared. I wish I could say that God healed me of my anxiety completely, but I believe that God showed me in that moment that I can go through anything in life, if I let go and let God be in control of my life than He will give me that peace and I wouldn’t have to be afraid. I tend to worry a lot, but since God let me experience that peace, I know now that it is available to us all. Trusting God does not come easy to me because of different tragic things happening in my life. I didn’t understand how a loving God the Father would let my dad commit suicide leaving a family of seven children, how he would let one of my brothers be raped and molested for years and how he would permit my son get sick of cancer and die, all happening within 10 years. Slowly I’m learning to trust God and believe that He is a loving Father, because the Bible says so and the Word of God is true. I hope that one day I can look back and say that God used such tragedies into something beautiful. My brother says, that he refuses to believe that there is no reason why he had to go though it. He says that if he can help one person find hope and healing in God than it was all worth it.
That’s a great addition! Thank you, Mark!
When I struggled with panic attacks I clung to some verses such as Isiah 41:10 which says: “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”